K reviews: WET

Game name: WET
Platform: PS3, Xbox360
Released: Sept 2009

WET is a Kill Bill-themed video game that shares the same mechanics as Max Payne and Dead to Rights. Players will play the role of Rubi, a hot chick with an attitude who does the dirty work for people for a money (LOL). You’ll be jumping through countless obstacles while shooting enemies in the game. The whole concept is no longer considered new in our gaming meta but the game does have its perks despite its lack of originality. The game is literally Kill Bill revamped into a video game. You’ll be traveling the world in search of the guy who wants you dead while facing a nice set of unique and creepy characters. 

You’ll start with a sword and dualwield pistols but will gain access to more firepower once you progress through the game. Upgrades like “increase weapon damage” can also be acquired through the item shop, allowing you to gain the upper advantage while at the same time increasing Rubi’s fighting style. 

Cut to the chase:

Aside from the horrendous graphics, WET’s controls are pretty stiff. Combined with the unforgiving level design, the crappy stiff controls make this game pretty hard. If you dont remember what it was like to make that long jump from the ledge in Super Mario Bros, this game is sure to refresh your memory. Just saying, it’s not the levels that make this game hard, but the sucky controls. While the game is supposed to be fast paced, you’re bound to take your time in order to not fall regularly. The camera angles are awkward as hell. You’ll find ruby blocking your view on certain occasions, making the jump a bit harder than hell. 

The game suffers from a lot of graphical glitches, with elements passing through objects and things vanishing into god knows where. If you think that’s all, WET also has a lot of bugs that’s sure to ruin the experience. There are times when doors refuse to open regardless of how fast you push the square button when doing so. The only remedy would be to exit the door opening mini game and try again. 

WTFH

The enjoyability factor diminishes itself after 30 mins of gameplay. The game features a lot of acrobatics but the controls are too fucked up to keep up. The profanity level is also awesome, as you’ll be seeing this hot chick saying FUCK FUCK all the way till the end of the game.  The game also features a nice set of timed button inputs during cinematics or even ingame, making the game a bit immersive regardless of its cons. 

Verdict? Dont buy it…

Stickei!!!

Hmm… referring to my previous post, I’m sorry to say that I have lost to the power of splurging temptation. I’ve been having a lot of problems with my shit stick lately, making this new purchase more or less feasible when it comes to fighting game goodness. Out of respect, I would like to post a pic of Shitstick to celebrate the life (and death) of one of the most crappiest sticks in the world.“REST IN PEACE SHITSTICK”

 

Anyway.. here goes! TADA!

 

HRAP3 Tekken 6 stickies! The packaging is quite nice but a bit hollow at some point. I mean the Blazblue stick gave us posters and stickers to go with the 5k stick, although I doubt I’d want to have a Kazuya or Jin sticker anytime soon. 

First of all, the stick does look nice. Clagged in black, the layout, one look and you’d know this piece of shit isn’t your average shitstick. The stick is Sanwa while the buttons are your average Hori ones making it quite similar to the Blazblue stick (really comfy to use). Technically the only difference between the two is that the Blazblue stick comes with stickers and posters while the Tekken stick’s stick is an inch farther than the buttons.

Useless feature: Both Horis seem to have this really stupid feature of letting the players program the stick to the controller’s left or right analog stick. Now who the fuck cares about that feature? it’s not like people can perform Hadoukens better with the right stick right? I’m not sure what forced Hori to do this but I guess they just have to add enough stuff to make this look more……. expensive?

There’s also a turbo option which is ideal for playing bullethell shooters like Ikaruga etc but its not like we have a lot of those games comin to our nextgen consoles right (maybe for the Wii)?

All in all, it was a great deal. The stick did function 150% better than the late Shitstick so I guess that’s that. 

K plays – Batman: Arkham Asylum

First of all, I’d like to say that I was truly surprised at how good this game was. After seeing Ironman, Superman, Spiderman and other Superhero based games, I was convinced that “Supers” really suck as videogames. If not a mindless beat-em-up game, most of these volumes would ponder on 2 player coop missions that would trick any kid into buying their titles.

I guess it’s about time we get a decent Super Hero game. Once again, our non-superhuman-smartass-rich-kid managed to beat his fellow heroes by becoming the first high rated nextgen comic-based game.

Batman: Arkham Asylum is a mixture of MGS stealth tactics (without the gayass crawling), GTA Freeroaming, and your average superhero beatemup game. To be honest, it does play a lot like Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune for the PS3. It has melee attackers (and a lot of em), targeting (with your not-so-lethal weapons), a nice sidescrolling view on certain parts, and of course the cheap mini games where you mash the X (PS3) and A (Xbox360) buttons in order to remove certain obstacles in the game. The game’s ratings came off as a surprise, especially due to my stereotypical outlook towards the Super hero gaming spectrum. Even if you’re not a Batman fan, the game’s definitely something for keeps.

Action WA-PACKed!

If you think that the game is just another sleathbased crawler then you’re dead wrong. The Codec is probably the only thing that Snake and Bats have in common. You’ll find yourself bashing enemies throughout the game, especially since Batman isn’t that much of a FAG to avoid combat all the time. The game uses a combo system that’s easy to get into. You basically have to press the attack button along with your desired direction key in order to keep your combo flowing. Regardless of his position, Batman will leap great distances while attacking multiple targets. You can also counter your enemies’ moves by pressing the counter key (triangle for the PS3 and Y for the xbox360) when you see your opponents give off the “I WILL ATTACK YOU” sign (or whatever you call it). The combat system is fairly easy but gets quite repetitive after some time, then again; it’s a semi beatemup game so I guess it’s normal.

Batsy against a pile of Dumbshits

Hmm… as far as the word ASYLUM is concerned, Batman’s foes are pretty stupid. Let’s say we have 2 thugs on the lookout, both facing  the same direction. If you were to knock down one of em in a stealthy manner (otherwise known as BATSECKS), the other one won’t even notice it, giving you another chance to knock him down. Great, not only are they stupid, they’re blind as well. Most of today’s nextgen games have excellent AIs, well scripted and ready to take on the player at any given time. I’m not sure if the developers did this on purpose since they ARE a pack of lunatics, but seeing Batman beat up these pathetic creatures make him more of a bully than a hero LOL.

Verdict

Hmm… well first of all, the game is PREEETY easy. I thought It’d be better to choose the hardest difficulty, so I did. To my surprise, the enemies still are still vulnerable to my BATSECKS strategy making it rather easy to finish the game. The only thing that made the game hard are the riddles. Yes, The Riddler has 240 riddles scattered around Arkham Island. I’m not sure how he did it, but it’s pretty cool. You can also collect various tapes that consist of the villains’ interviews during their stay in the Asylum, giving you a better perspective of how crazy and demented they are. The boss fights are extremely easy even in Hardmode. To be honest, most of my ingame deaths resulted from mobs and pitfalls (if you count em). The graphics are a bit crispy, with jitters emanating from the character’s bodyframe. The characters could use a bit more detail since they all look more like a bunch of prerendered models. Anyway, regardless of the game’s flaws, I still think that it deserves a high rating. Sure it was easy, but it was one hell of an experience. Look on the bright side, it doesnt give people C’s after finishing it. OH JOY.

Why Japanese Games hate regular gamers

Have you ever finished a game that gave you nothing but the letter “C“? No sir, that does not mean that you’re a nOob, it merely states that you have a life. Japanese gamers are without a doubt the most hardcore lineage of gamers to ever hit the planet. If you think that these people would settle for a few games of RockBand, then you’re dead wrong. Japanese games tend to look impossible at first, giving you a set of challenges that would take weeks or even years for a CASUAL gamer to beat. If you manage to witness Drummania’s “The Least 100 Seconds”, you’ll know what I mean.

The big difference between Japanese games (or Asian games) and Western games is that Western ones normally reward you for your gut-wrenching effort. Japanese games are quite good since people tend to love their SURREAL storyline, which are mostly about guys who will fight to the death just to save a girl they met 5 mins ago. You also have the Silent fag who isn’t as dedicated as the hero but looks cooler and dresses skimpier than the main protagonist.

Trauma Center would probably be the best example for this type of treatment, which gives you nothing but Cs and Ds until you finish the game. Don’t worry though, since the game does reward you by branding your save file with a BIG C (See? that wasn’t so bad now was it? LOL). Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate Jap games; in fact, I’ve been an avid Guilty gear player back then. Unlike other games like Mortal Kombat and Killer Instinct LOL, Guilty Gear demands massive training in order for you to PLAY IT RIGHT. No sir, this is NOT your average “OH I can do the Hadouken and can perform 2 Supers at the same time I must be teh invincible player loldesuyo” game (No wonder western peeps hate it).

When you finish Japanese games, you’ll feel terrific since they’ll say something like “CONGRATS! YOU HAVE FINISHED TEH GAYM IN 58 HOURS NOOB! RANK- D” (ah yes… so rewarding). Normally, people would just say “Hey! I finished the game!” and move on to the next title; however, these games tell you that YOU SUCK BIGTIME and must play again to achieve a higher rank. This doesn’t really add up to the game’s replayability factor since it doesn’t deal with the game’s diversity but rather you being SUCKY as a player.

Know that the C rank doesn’t really mean that you suck as a player, it’s basically there to certify that you are not the type to spend 77 hours in front of your console.

LOL, anyway as for the grind factor… Asian games tend to make players grind more (both in MMO games and Console RPGs). It’s not really a bad thing since most gamers actually want some kind of punishment in order to say that they’ve EARNED their longdeserved victory. Day and night, these gamers run around the world map trying to find their next opponent just to train hard enough to dub themselves as TEH NEX HOKAGE.

Hardcore games =/= better games, and that’s a fact. Japanese games are quite hardcore but finishing them doesn’t quite reward you as well as it should. Sure there are achievement points, but do you honestly have to replay the game over and over again just so you could get the BIGBOSS rank? The game developers sure made a strong love potion there. Each Jap game is a whole gaming community on its own. Each game is treated in a way that makes it seem like the only game that people play (OR CAN PLAY).

“Quickly! you must get the A rank so the other douchefags who don’t give a fuck about you and your game can grow jealous and eat sweatsocks while they are busy playing different games that don’t have bishfags who are into kissing othermen and looking like women because it is trendy in japan but its not trendy here so it makes you look like a fag without the bish cuz bish is a japword that exists in your vocabulary just like the way girls say OMGEE look at this kawaii poster of the baka neko neko!”

omg… I think I over did it there.

Anyway, I’ll leave you to your 58 hour grind now! I must be off to parteh with teh woodland fairies in my “Spare time”.

SBO 2009 Blazblue results (updated tier list)

First of all, the results are a bit depressing since the 3 God tiers managed to screw everyone over once again. We were actually rooting for MikeZ, who happens to be the best Tager so far. It wouldn’t hurt to see a bottom tier character win once in a while; unfortunately, the man couldn’t make it (and to the dude in Gamespot who misunderstood… I meant HE COUDN’T JOIN… I dont know why and  I dont know how…). Anyway, here’s the list:

Winner’s are in bold.

BlazBlue Singles Tournament

1st round results:

A Block

Souji (Arakune) vs. Godhand (Jin)
Masutani (Bang) vs. Ke-chan (Rachel)
Goodbye Earth (Rachel) vs. NyanNyanNu- (Nu)
Nezu (Bang) vs. kakutoubishinTaokaka (Nu)

B Block

Dora (Bang) vs. Saki (Nu)
Shonen (Litchi) vs. Zero (Hakumen)
Konan (Jin) vs. Kid Viper (Jin)
Tsukasa (Nu) vs. Kurenai ya (Noel)

C Block

Miu (Jin) vs. Nochun (Litchi)
Azu (Nu) vs. Halloween (Rachel)
Kyaku (Carl) vs. Relia (Nu)
Kouji (Tager) vs. Kogatan (Jin)

D Block

HeartNana (Noel) vs. Inoue (Nu)
Kimoniku (Rachel) vs. Diechan (Litchi)
Ikemen (Nu) vs. Ora (Ragna)
Sato-One (Arakune) vs. Mebo (Taokaka)

E Block

Shuta (Ragna) vs. Maria (Arakune)
Ki-fa (Arakune) vs. Fumo (Arakune)
EnseiseiUzai (Rachel) vs. Ribaia (Nu)
Tobari (Rachel) vs. NEFE (Nu)

F Block

Hima (Arakune) vs. Ako (Arakune)
BLEED (Litchi) vs. MechaSue (Carl)
Isa (Arakune) vs. Parosupe (Jin)
Bonus Game (Rachel) vs. Toriatsukai-chuui aka Handle with Care (Arakune)

G Block

Denpa (Taokaka) vs. ANG (Nu)
Aoniku (Rachel) vs. Kyou (Nu)
Tokido (Arakune) vs. Eru (Rachel)
Wataru (Ragna) vs. Kazuhira (Taokaka)

H Block

Ren (Jin) vs. Keshigomu (Noel)
NOtoko (Rachel) vs. Kamiyu (arakune)
Chou (Nu) vs. Makoto (Nu)
Tsubaki aka DIO(Carl) vs. F (Nu)

2nd round results:

A Block

Souji (Arakune) vs. Ke-chan (Rachel)
NyanNyanNu- (Nu) vs. kakutoubishinTaokaka (Nu)

B Block

Dora (Bang) vs. Zero (Hakumen)
Konan (Jin) vs. Tsukasa (Nu)

C Block

Nochun (Litchi) vs. Kyaku (Carl)
Azu (Nu) vs. Kogatan (Jin)

D Block

Inoue (Nu) vs. Mebo (Taokaka)
Ikemen (Nu) vs. Diechan (Litchi)

E Block

Maria (Arakune) vs. Fumo (Arakune)
Ribaia (Nu) vs. Tobari (Rachel)

F Block

Hima (Arakune) vs. BLEED (Litchi)
Isa (Arakune) vs. Bonus Game (Rachel)

G Block

ANG (Nu) vs. Kyou (Nu)
Eru (Rachel) vs. Kazuhira (Taokaka)

H Block

Keshigomu (Noel) vs. NOtoko (Rachel)
Chou (Nu) vs. DIO (Carl)

3rd round results:

A Block – Ke-chan (Rachel) vs. kakutoubishinTaokaka (Nu)
B Block – Dora (Bang) vs. Tsukasa (Nu)
C Block – Kyaku (Carl) vs. Azu (Nu)
D Block – Mebo (Taokaka) vs. Diechan (Litchi)
E Block – Fumo (Arakune) vs. Ribaia (Nu)
F Block – BLEED (Litchi) vs. Bonus Game (Rachel)
G Block – Kyou (Nu) vs. Eru (Rachel)
H Block – NOtoko (Rachel) vs. Chou (Nu)

Top 8:

kakutoubishinTaokaka (Nu) vs. Dora (Bang)
Kyaku (Carl) vs. Diechan (Litchi)
Fumo (Arakune) vs. BLEED (Litchi)
Eru (Rachel) vs. Chou (Nu)

Top 4:

kakutoubishinTaokaka (Nu) vs. Kyaku (Carl)
Fumo (Arakune) vs. Chou (Nu)

Finalists:

Kyaku (Carl) vs. Fumo (Arakune)

Winner:Fumo (Arakune)

As for the new tier list: No Classes specified, but they are in order.

Rachel 1260
Nu-13 1227
Arakune 1206
Carl 1195
Litchi 1075
Jin 1061
Ragna
Hakumen
Bang <— OMFG Dora NUUU LOL
Noel <—– R-1 Never made it LOL
Taokaka
Tager <—– MikeZ never made it (TO THE TOURNAMENT YOU RETARD!)LOL

Hmmm… never thought I’d see Taokaka

RIG UPDATE COMPLETE

-Complete the Loft setup

Alright. Finally, I was wondering when I would get to finish this.

I got the table for a pretty cheap deal. For a 71″ table with tons of shelves and cabinets, you can’t deny that 4,880 php is a pretty cheap price to pay. If you’re interested I got mine in Home Depot Ortigas. There’s only1 more table left so you might want to get it asap if you’re interested.

“Oh hi there!”
The TV sits firmly in the middle of the platform, along with the Xbox and of course the 1p contollers. The front L & R speakers are also locked on the table’s edges giving the user a nice feel of its 5.1 goodness.

I was actually planning to put the 360 on top of the DVD player but these type of shelves emits dust like crazy, making it hard to clean at times. At least the PS3 and the Wii has a lot of space over there. It will be much easier to dust them off with my magnetic duster this way. The table used to have 4 shelves all in all but I had to sacrifice one due to the PS3’s back switch.

There…. It looks like everything is finally in order. I’m still thinking about sacrificing another shelf partition. That way I can replace the DVD player with my 360 and at the same time provide my xbox with an easy to clean shelf. The only thing that makes this idea so hard would be the fact that the DVD player is connected to the Home theatre system, meaning I’ll have to expose TONS of wires if I do move it.

OH-KEI! now that everything is in order, I guess I can finally start playing…. tootles~

The Obama Sushi: OMFG! KILL IT WITH FIRE!

It would seem that Obama’s face has been printed in more places than your local newspaper. Yes! It’s yummy! it’s tasty! Presenting the OBAMA SUSHI! I laughed my brains out after seeing this on the internet. I know that those crazy Japs are always trying to make the next best thing, but this is just WAAAAAY OHOOOHOOOAWWWESOME! Making a totally Western concept out of your everyday  Japanese cuisine may seem a bit challenging; however, that didn’t stop Mr. Kawazumi from creating his own work of art. A thick layer of japanese rice (brown rice?) make up the foundation of Obama’s face, following it up with a dash of shrimp, fish paste, and black sesame seeds for the detail.

Wow… I bet the other presidents never had their faces imprinted on a sushi platter. Hell tasting this would probably be a Keichievement on its own. You have to admit… that sushy looks a lot like him O_O

I’m not too sure about how Obama will feel about this, but hell it’ll probably be quite interesting to see how you’d taste like as a sushi XD

As for the finished product:

Aw shit…. that looks… extremely awesome… THAT’S IT! I’M ORDERING SUSHI!

Batman Arkham Asylum: Become the fear that strikes from the darkness

First of all, I’d like to say that the DEMO was superb. It really gave me a good idea of what Arkham Asylum would look like on a horrifying perspective. Batman Arkham Asylum takes you deep into the world of insanity as you try to catch Gotham’s criminal masterminds (More of the Joker to be specific). At first I thought that the game was just another beat em up version of the Batman franchise. I guess I’m happy to say that I was wrong.

The game encourages stealth since you really can’t take on your foes head on due to your lack of artillery (guns to be precise). It was quite a relief to see a dark Batman game so you might want to purchase it once it gets out.

Batsy gadgets

You’ll make use of the grappling hook and other Batman gadgets as you progress in the game. You can also turn on detective mode which gives you a wireframed look of your surroundings (kind of like Predator’s vision). From there you can distinguish where to attack and where to hide when things get messy.

Metal Gear in Super hero tights.

The game really gives off a Metal Gearish impression since you’ll be sneaking behind your enemy to avoid unnecessary conflicts. Since batman lacks the guts to use guns, you’ll be feeling the bitter drawbacks as you work your way inside the asylum. Worry not though, because you will have his handy dandy batsy accessories to aid you in your journey.

The demo is rather short compared to other demos (finished it in 15 mins to be exact). I guess the only object of the demo was to show you how his bat-tastic gadgets work. The graphics are pretty polished and runs spectacularly well (especially since it’s just the demo). I’m not sure about pimping up the graphics since most of these games experience extreme frame lags after getting their final pimping.

Note: My only gripe against this demo would be the fact that it didn’t let me face the first boss T__T

The demo is now available for the PS3, 360 and PC. Happy Bat-ing!

Say goodbye to Warcraft 3: Dota’s doing independent!

It’s quite evident that DotA AKA Defense of the Ancients has become quite popular around the world. In fact, the game became too popular that most Warcraft characters have been addressed the wrong way. Seeing people run around calling Illidan *cough* “Terrorblade” was enough to justify the game’s fame. It’s just funny how this custom WarCraft 3 map actually managed to become a tournament game. There’s no doubt that this game is the only thing that keeps the WC3 engine alive, and since we’re practically in the next generation of gaming, the WC3 engine will no longer suffice.

The “Heroes of Newerth” as they call it is a totally revamped version of DotA. Along with returning characters and same method of gameplay, who could ever resist playing DotA without those outdated 3d models? IceFrog (The maker of DotA) wasn’t really involved in the making of this project but was gracious enough to give it his blessings, and even though the game is about to enter a new phase, Icefrog stated that he will STILL be making DotA maps for the WC3 engine (at least for those who are still interested).

The game is pay to play and requires a one time payment for creating an account. When I think about it, if you’re gonna go to the internet cafe just to play it, why not save up for an account instead?

Finally…. 16:9 compatibility…. without having to make your characters obese.

LOLOLOL

Chronosphere FTW

Who you gonna call?

Ah yes… one of the most awesome cartoons ever made (come on! it’s pretty awesome for an 80’s cartoon). I remember praying for a proton pack back then when I was young  (Which I got for my 7th birthday, thank god). My cousins and I would always play Ghostbusters with only one proton pack, prolly cuz they didn’t pray hard enough LOL.

Remember the good old days when simple graphics satisfy your lust for good visuals? Believe it or not, this game was practically GOD back then. semi realistic faces, excellent 16-bit sounds, awesome 16-bit shading system, yep! It’ was ghost busting madness unlike anything you’ve ever seen before.. I remember getting my first Sega Genesis, let alone my first game “Ghostbusters”. I have to admit, I really do miss those days. We would play day and night, trying to beat the game over and over again (yes, from start to finish) due to the game’s lack of saving features. No memory cards, no HDTVs, No nothing. It gets pretty hard whenever a friend asks you to show him the ending, let alone certain bosses. It’s cause you’ll have to go through the whole thing all over again just to see to certain scenes. No, finishing this through an emulator doesn’t make you awesome… try to finish it without saving, and with limited continues LOL.

Anyway, thanks to the power of today’s technology, I managed to see my old heroes come to life. Yeah, it’s not the best game out there, but it does feel nice to finally get a whiff of that proton pack (Without foam bullets).

Ghost trapping at its finest.

“on three..” “THREE!!!”